Monthly Archives: September 2017

What He Learned in Kindergarten

Recently I came across  Robert FulghumAll I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten:

And I thought what our leader may have learned if anything.  What Fulghum and many of the rest of us learned follows with what our leader probably learned is interspersed in red. 

1. Share everything.  – Keep everything for me. 
2. Play fair.  — Play to win.  Fair is for losers.
3. Don’t hit people.  – Yeah, there are better ways to get even with them.
4. Put things back where you found them.  – The help can pick them up.
5. CLEAN UP YOUR OWN MESS. –  See above. 
6. Don’t take things that aren’t yours.  –  It should be mine, so I’m keeping it.
7. Say you’re SORRY when you HURT somebody. – That’s for losers.
8. Wash your hands before you eat. – Yeah, why not.
9. Flush. – Flush your opponents and those not loyal to you down the drain.
10. Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.  Yeah, why not.
11. Live a balanced life – learn some and drink some and draw some and paint some and sing and dance and play and work everyday some. — Make more money each day.  
12. Take a nap every afternoon.  And miss something on Fox News?
13. When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together. No way, I’m going out there for me.
14. Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Stryrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.  Who cares about this.  How will it help me get more?
15. Goldfish and hamster and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup – they all die. So do we. — But I’ll die a lot richer and more loved than you jerks. 
16. And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned – the biggest word of all – LOOK.”  — First, I don’t read books.  If it ain’t on Fox, it ain’t real.  Look.  Why would you waste your time doing that? 

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